Posts Tagged ‘ aviation ’

Race-Related? Watch Your Mouth.

mistake A couple of days ago, I walked into the lunch room at our school, and into an ongoing conversation about Zimmerman being pronounced “not guilty.” I said “Oooh boy” under my breath but also out loud, as I got my lunch out of the fridge, kind of without thinking about it. You know — sort of an involuntary reaction which says, “This should be good…” even though i had no intention of injecting myself into the conversation. Then he looked at me and said, “Oh, well what do you think would happen if it was a black man killed a white man?”

I should have said, “Hey, OJ got off, didn’t he?” but instead I took the diplomatic route: “The same thing that would happen when a black man kills a black man. It’s murder, he’d go to jail.” Or, he’d be voted not guilty by a panel of his peers. Or they wouldn’t have bothered trying him at all, because the DA knew right out of the gate that there wasn’t enough evidence to convict.

I thought he was going to be alright just discussing the topic. It isn’t smart to discuss these things at work because they can get people riled, but I don’t get offended easily and am careful about the opinions I put forth. I also respect others’ right to their opinion, and don’t go off the handle when someone disagrees with me. He also kept a pretty even tone, and didn’t appear to be losing it, so I was open to what he had to say. But he somehow then managed to go straight into slavery –f*cking SLAVERY — telling me about, “Why is it right that some people get reparations and others don’t?” (That’s a direct quote, I’m not making this up.)

This is a black, late-fifties security guard, asking me this in front of another instructor of ours, who happens to be black as well. Who I happen to have a pleasant working relationship with. Way to put me on the spot there, pal.

My immediate reaction was to tell him, “Because neither you nor anyone you have ever known was a slave in this country.” He told me that his mother’s grandmother was born in 1886 (or some similar personal fact), but it’s irrelevant. Even if his great-great-great grandparents were slaves, we are five to six generations removed from those atrocities, and an increasing majority of people in this country had little or nothing to do with them. My family wasn’t even in the United States yet, while that was going on. I continued, “Also, because taking money from people who had absolutely nothing to do with what happened and giving it to people who didn’t either is wrong.”

He told me, “No, it isn’t,” and I knew that we could no longer have an intelligent, rational conversation. He made a big stink about “ending the conversation” as he left the lunch room, and after he left, all I could think of was, “WHY did he have to go and do that?”

After we got back from lunch, I told my class that sometimes, discussing things of that nature at work gets dangerous, and that once they are said, they can’t be UNsaid. They kept pushing me to give them the details, to figure out what happened and who said what; I declined but told them, “I didn’t tell you this to talk sh*t on this guy behind his back; I told you this so that you can watch your mouth when you’re in the field and working around people you don’t know.”

I realize that I cannot begin to imagine what it would be like to have a family history related to that era, and for folks who do, the memory of what happened never really dies. I also believe, however, that it makes no sense for people to direct anger at each other over something that happened over a hundred and fifty years ago. Doing so is a large part of the reason that problems are the way they are in the Middle East, for example. Senseless atrocities happen all the time. There’s no minimizing them, of course, but when there’s no one to hold accountable, there’s no choice but to find a way to move on. Penalizing people unrelated to the crime is wrong, however good it might make one feel.

In any case, I want to caution you to bite your tongue at work. I am not much for ‘polite’ etiquette, but as I said to my class, you might reveal something about yourself which will change your coworkers’ — the people you see more than your own family, in some cases — opinion of you for the worse.

DuoLingo: Learning A Language, Gamified

I wrote a post a little while back about my family’s Italian heritage, and the Order Sons Of Italy and all of that, but what I might have forgotten to mention is that my wife and I have been trying to teach ourselves to speak the language on and off for at least three years now.  I used to think my only hope was Rosetta Stone, because even programs as extensive as Berlitz were easy to fall out of using, and tedious to learn with.  Basic vocabulary is difficult enough to remember, even without introducing the vague concepts of verb tenses, I/you/we/they conjugations, and whatever other special little rules the language contains.

I’ve been having a pretty easy time learning what I have lately with this website called Duolingo.  They offer Italian, Spanish, French, German, Portugese, and English–all completely free–but here’s the kicker:  They’ve “gamified” it so you’ll actually continue to use it.  

Basic Home Screen. They Say You Can Be Fluent In 3 Months!

It’s everything you could ever want in a language program.  You don’t even really sign up as you sign in with your Facebook information–it’s like this site was just waiting for you to get off your duff and make use of it.  Their learning tree is simple and easy to look at, their mascot (an owl) appears in your email to keep you motivated to keep after your chosen language, and they hit every word and sentence type from several different angles at the time that you learn it.  That way, you don’t learn a word, then try to figure out how to fit it into different sentences later on, when the word has become fuzzy or forgotten all together.  Also, you can “invite” your friends to learn with you, and compete against them in a learning race.  It’s much the same way that Rosetta Stone’s method immerses you in the language…except it isn’t six hundred bucks.  It’s free.

I’m sure they are working on more languages as we speak, but for now, I’m happy that Italian was one of their chosen languages to launch the site with.  Pick out a language and start learning it!    

 

In Communicado

Hey All!  I hope that your weekend has been relaxing, and your upcoming week will be moving along splendidly.  Mine is shaping up to be interesting, to say the least.  Lately, I have been back in the rhythm of learning and doing new things on a fairly regular basis, and it feels fantastic!

One end for talking, the other for LISTENING.

This week, I got an email from Chris Brogan like I usually do on Sunday mornings, and its focus was on something that I continually strive to be better at:  Communication.  You may remember that I shamelessly plugged Chris’ company (Human Business Works) once before, and as before, I am not being paid in any fashion to promote his products.  The guy just puts amazing content into my email box for free, and I wanted you to know.  This is an example of great stuff spreading by word of mouth.

This morning’s newsletter talked about communication in a very interesting way.  Actually, the message of this morning’s “discussion,” as it were, was more along the lines of, “If you share/repost/reblog someone’s stuff, give them credit for it because it’s the awesome thing to do,” but here’s what I took from it:

This guy  puts some great content on Twitter (a site I rarely use to post 147 characters of useless information about my lunch), and Chris linked to it.  I clicked, and found something really interesting–which is the focus of my own message today.

As I read down the list of his Ten Commandments Of Conversation, I couldn’t help but nod my head.  I cannot tell you how many folks I come across whose ultimate goal is to convince me of a particular political idea, or complain about something, or dream out loud about things they may or may not ever do, or tell me every last detail of the way their first love ended, even if it was twenty years ago.  I used to think that everyone found what I had to say interesting, until I began to realize that if I’m talking to someone and thinking about other things, they must have been thinking that about some of the things I was saying to them.  In fact, I’ll never forget once when I was in college, I was catching up with my brother one night on the phone, and he cut me off with a, “Dude, get to the point.”

The truth is that when you communicate with someone, it would be helpful to imagine that you can only communicate your message to that person in writing.  Can you imagine how long a rant of yours would take to literally write out on a piece of paper?  You wouldn’t bother.  You’ll sit there and ponder for a second what your message really is, so that you can get it down on paper in (something close to) the least amount of words it will take you to.  Speak as if you were writing, and you will train yourself to hone the message you are trying to convey down to the simplest, most essential points.

You may feel it, but resist it. Smile the whole time. It goes a looooong way!

Combine this technique with the other Commandments (by using your one mouth half as much as your two ears) and people will walk away from a conversation with you with fond memories in their head, and not even give it a thought as to why.  I’ve had people talk “at” me for upwards of 45 minutes, and the entire time, I am the one coaching the conversation along.  I’ll ask pointed questions, get them to tell me about the things that matter most to them–family, home life, pets, jobs, egos, goals, how they’re getting ahead…I’m telling you, some of these folks greet me very fondly on a regular basis, and they don’t know hardly a thing about me.  Why?  For no other reason than they haven’t taken the time to ask.

It feels great when someone wants to know things about you, doesn’t it?  Well, if your goal is to help those around you to be more comfortable in your presence, just ask questionsand actually listen to the answers.  Remember them for future reference.  In fact, if you really want to get crazy with it, you can do what Bill Clinton (one of the best networkers of our time) did and keep track of those you meet.  It doesn’t even matter if this person bores you to no end–if their only interaction with you induces happy chemicals in their head, they will remember you fondly when they get promoted from newbie desk jockey to branch manager.  Whether you know it or not, you guide every person, every day into the place in your life that you want them.  If you want to get ahead, guide those people into a place that makes them feel great about you.  The rest will work itself out.

The point is that everyone you meet is judging you.  Your face, your body, your clothes, your breath, your skills…they are making judgments on every single little signal that comes through when you communicate with them.  Your job is to convince them that you are worth every second of their time (and you are.)  It’s ironic that the easiest way to do that is to get them talking about themselves, but ignore the irony and focus on the fact that it works.  You’ll be happy that you did.

So…who’s got troubles with those around you?  Caustic people?  The guy with terrible breath?  The guy/gal who wears things to work that no one has any business wearing to work?  The person who dominates every conversation?  The condescending/micromanaging/unconfident/overly-involved-in-your-personal-life/lackadaisical boss?  If you’d like an opinion on how to handle certain people, I’m sure anyone reading here will be happy to help.  We only want the best for you, so if you need a hand with a certain situation, feel free to comment here.  The advice may (or may not) be backed up by PhD graduates, but either way, it’s free!

Here’s to a great week!

Making The Distance A Little Smaller…

I have this fantasy (it’s a goal, actually) that I’m currently working toward, as I find my footing in the real estate business.

Black circles are where everyone’s from. I want us all in one place some day!

 

See, all of my family, and most of my wife’s, live in the Chicagoland area.  I’ve lived away from the Chicago area for a sum total of nearly ten years now–2 of them in college, and the past 8 for various reasons–and it has made things difficult when it comes to having access to family.  When I was living in Salina, KS during college, I couldn’t make it in for several cousins’ weddings, and one cousin’s funeral because I had no money or transportation.

Having further lived in Wichita, Tucson, and now outside DC does not make things easier.  In December of 2009, Alli and I went home for a week for Christmas.  When my Dad passed away suddenly the next month (January 2010), I dropped everything and drove home for a week.  The following month, I went home to see my brother marry the love of his life.  Three trips home in three months.  I had no paid time off built up for any of it.

The goal that I am working toward right now will be one of my life’s biggest accomplishments once it happens:  I want to get everyone I care about in one place for at least a weekend–a ski trip, or maybe a cruise.  I was thinking about what it would take to accomplish this a couple of days ago, and I didn’t realize the sheer magnitude of the number of people I would want to be there.  My extended family on both sides is enormous (I grew up with 22 aunts and uncles, each with two to four kids), and Alli’s whole family would probably be another  thirty to forty people.  But beyond that is how scattered everyone is.  I haven’t made any kind of head count yet, but I personally have family or dear friends from the states of IL, KS, AZ, OK, TX, VT, WI, VA, CO, LA and FL.  Eleven states.

It’s been my goal since I got into real estate to make enough money to fund quicker and easier access to friends and family, but it just hit me recently how cool it would be to make my wish of having everyone in the same place actually come true.

There’s one key point about this goal that will make me happy to see it all happen:  As my wife mentioned, “Well, I’m sure you’ll reach your goal if you die.”  Heh…the goal is to be alive for it the first time.  I guess she’s right, though–part of my legacy has been set in motion already, and I have no real control over it.  *wink*

Old Man Winter’s A-Comin’!

Old fuel–the sludge is on the bottom.

Hey folks, it’s finally getting to be my favorite weather outside–what my friends and I have called “HoodieWeather” for as long as I can remember.  Well, quick on the heels of Autumn is going to be Winter which, depending on your geographical area, will entail cooler (or colder) temperatures at the very least, and at worst, an emergency trip to the Home Depot for shovels, snowblowers, and generators when a good blizzard comes through and locks up normal life for a few days or a week.

Well, are you prepared to deal with winter this year?  Or with a crazy storm, if it comes through?

First, if you don’t have a generator, get one.  When all else fails, a source of electricity is a life-saver.  If you have the space, get two of them, and the next time your whole neighborhood is in the dark, you could probably find someone to rent your spare to.  Do this enough times, and it shouldn’t take five years to pay itself off!  If you already have a generator–write this down, it’s important–chances are good that it’s been sitting all year in your shed or garage, untouched.  The problem with this is that the gasoline has probably begun to deteriorate into a sloppy, slimy gel at the bottom of the tank.  This will clog your fuel injectors, and prevent your motor from ever getting started when you need it most.  Take your generator out, bring it back to life, and run it a few times now, while you have the time to figure things out if it won’t start.  Engines like to run, so knock the cobwebs out of yours now!

 

Second, get your furnace a tune-up.  You can replace the filter yourself, but get someone out to your home to give your furnace a thorough inspection.  The last thing you’ll want to have to deal with is losing your home’s heat on the coldest night of the entire year (which, as Murphy’s Law states, is exactly when it will happen).

Not the Porsche!

Third, check on your water pipes.  When your pipes aren’t insulated correctly, they can freeze–and when they freeze, they can burst.  Who needs to deal with a near-freezing lake in their basement?  And actually–to add to that point, it wouldn’t hurt you to know where your main system water shutoff valves are located.  You’ll save yourself time and energy simply by knowing where these are, because there’s a fair amount of panic involved when a pipe bursts, and every second the valve is open can cost you 20 or 30 extra minutes of cleaning up after a gusher.

Do the same with your gas shutoff valve, too–any leak is cause for immediate evacuation, and not knowing where the valve is could cost you dearly when the temperature in your home drops, and your furnace decides to try to kick on.  BOOM! Here’s an easy way to find both of them.

 

There is still plenty of time to get these things done–get after them now, and you’ll thank yourself later.  A little preparation goes a looooong way!

The Great Unknown…Returning To School and Career Change At 30.

The time has come to stage my coup.

I’ve been accepted into The American University’s Kogod School of Business, and I can’t wait to get that ball rolling in the fall.  Further, the time has come for me to transition out of aviation (for now) and into a subject that I began focusing on and learning about over five years ago now:  Real Estate.

Business and Real Estate–two things I have no formal experience or education with yet.  I’m leaving the comfort of showing up to work every day at 8am (or 7, or 5, or 6pm), punching the time clock, working on tangible, mechanical things and seeing tangible results…the truth is that I have no idea what will happen in the next couple of months.

It’s both exciting and terrifying.

But you know what?  Nothing will happen if I don’t do it myself, right?  I’m ambitious–sometimes too much so, according to some–and I’ve been waiting for five years to be able to act on this.  I only put it off that long so my wife could properly finish her graduate degree in Arizona, and we lived on my salary alone before we moved out here to Virginia.

Frankly, I’m nervous about how we will survive here while I’m in school.  Our bills aren’t exorbitant, but our cost of living here is.  A nice place in a relatively safe area has been running us nearly $1700 per month in rent, and that isn’t unreasonable out here.  We have basic cable, two sensible, reliable vehicles, and some credit card debt to deal with, but otherwise, we aren’t spendthrift.  We had smartphones (which I got us for cheap during a free upgrade period with our provider), but we downgraded them to save $60 a month on the (required) data plans.  We’ve held off on buying an iPad, despite how handy we would both find one to be–and how much we salivate every time another iteration of it comes out.  We’re getting rid of cable, because it makes more sense to rely on Netflix or Hulu than to pay out the nose for three hundred channels of “WasteYourTimeHere.”  We’re trying to find a cheaper place to move, but we don’t want to dig up $3400 to break our lease early–and that’s if we could even find something.  The occupancy rates at apartments are so high out here that we didn’t even bother looking at several of them because we simply couldn’t find parking near the leasing office.  It’s a great time to own an apartment building.

We’re downsizing as many of our expenses as possible to keep our bills within my wife’s salary alone, in anticipation of my starting school, and the income lag from starting in real estate.  I’ll pick up a job to get through it if I have to, but I’d prefer to have the ability to focus my energy on schoolwork, internships, and networking opportunities if I can.

And then there’s the real estate.

I plan on being a licensed Realtor by September, when school starts.  I figure it will pay off because I’m pretty decent at networking, I talk to everybody, and being in classes with hundreds of students every day gives me the chance to build a friendly rapport with a captive audience.  This will let me capitalize the most out of my time there, because look at this:  The average price of a home in Muncie, IN is something like $185K.  The average price of a property here in the DC area is nearing $400K.  Some of the contacts I have figured out that it would take literally three times as many homes sold in Indiana as it would to make the same money here.  DC will treat me well, if I can wiggle my way into it, and figure out what makes it tick.   As it stands right now, though, almost no one knows me, and I have but a few people in my address book here in the area.  That, of course, is up to me to change, and I intend to; it’s just that everything takes time.

I’m excited about my prospects, though.  I’ve been doing my homework on these choices for years now, and I’m confident they are the right way for me to go.  In five years, I expect to have achieved my goals.  I am standing on the precipice of a turning point in my life.  I know I’ll do it–I know I need to–but it doesn’t stop me from being consumed with trepidation of the unknown, and frustrated by the constant juggling I’ll have to do until I cross the finish line.  I guess that just means I’m human.

Enough about me–what’s new in your life?  What’s the next Great Unknown project you are tackling?  Has it gone according to plan for you?  Did you anticipate the issues you ran into, or were you blind sided by some of them?

“You’re Trying To Run Before You Can Walk.”

I’ve addressed this in a past post, and I was just thinking about it some more.  When someone says this adage to you, what is your first reaction?  I’ll tell you mine:

“So what?”

Am I a complete idiot for already having accepted that I’ll trip up and fail a few times?  Any time I do something new for the first time, I fail at it in some form or another.  If there’s a certainty in my life other than death and taxes, that is it.  When I picked up a straight razor for the first time, I nicked myself more than a couple of times.  When I snowboarded for the first time, (after literally falling off the lift chair at the top) it took me two and a half hours to get down the hill.  I hadn’t taken a class, just jumped right in.  When I was learning to fly, I managed to almost injure myself and the school’s airplanes several times.  The first time I tried to replace the E string on my guitar, I tightened it so much that it snapped on me.  (I maintain now that it was a faulty string, but I didn’t know any better at the time, so for all I knew, I did it wrong.)  The first time I ever drove a stick shift was when I was in college, when I was the only sober one to drive home.  I knew the mechanics of it, but it was a long and uncomfortable ride for the others in the car as I figured it out.

Shall I continue on with all of the mistakes I’ve made along the way?  “Run before I can walk?”  Give me a break.

The second time down that mountain on the snowboard, it took me just fifteen minutes, and I was far more controlled about it.  Things like driving a manual transmission and restringing my guitar are second nature for me now.  Shaving has actually become a soothing time for me, now that I know what I’m doing with my razor.  And if you think the mistakes I made as a flight student make me a terrible pilot, you’re dead wrong.  In fact, you want someone who made some mistakes and seen some things–those are the people who know what they are getting into ahead of time.  I’m not current right now, but at the time I was flying regularly, I could do crosswind landings in my sleep.

What have you failed at?  How miserably have you failed, and then crawled back from the dead to succeed?

Why do we demonize risk and failures, and then remain unable to figure out why things don’t change?  How else am I supposed to grow?

To be clear, I realize now that there is in fact a smart way to approach new things, one that mitigates some of the inherent risk:  Education.  Education is the best way to get a leg-up on the task at hand.  I know that when I have prepared for the task at hand, trying something new becomes an exercise in honing the craft instead of merely surviving it.  I will still fail, just in fewer of the more painful places to.  I will still trip, but I’ll have already put on kneepads and gloves.  At that point, all that’s left to do is stand back up and begin moving forward again.  Some days, simply standing back up will be considered successful, but it doesn’t matter.

At least I had the courage to show up.

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